It’s been two days since I’m trying to write something. I choose the words and put them in the right order. Yet, when I look at them, they seem strange, as if it’s the first time I’ve ever seen them. Delete. Write. Delete. I go to sleep feeling powerless.
Today I wake up hoping to finish what I’m trying to say. Or at least to forget about it. It’s sunny and I have breakfast in bed, the sun on my face. Not bad for a Wednesday morning in November, I guess. I almost feel distracted. When I look at my phone, however, I’m back to where I was the night before. Write. Delete. I give up.
The house’s a mess and my dress needs ironing. The prospect of meeting Ana for coffee gives me a reason to pull myself together.
White Label Coffee is such a nice place to be during week days. Unlike on Saturdays or Sundays, one can actually find a seat now.
Ana looks all comfortable in her leather chair, the shoes off her feet, typing something at her laptop. As I’m preparing to give her a hug, I realise she is not the only one typing at the laptop. And she is not the only one with her shoes off either.
It takes me less than a second to acknowledge that 1) I like the place a lot, 2) I cannot write in cafés – I can barely write at home, in total silence and with no distractions – 3) I definitely feel more comfortable with my shoes on.
Meeting Ana and talking about our creative endeavours together makes me feel better. That is, it makes me forget about my writing issues. I don’t stay for too long though. Ana has a blog post to write, and I hope to find some inspiration of my own. Besides, I need to do some grocery shopping on my way back home, and I need to grab some lunch, too. Don’t I just love practicalities?
In the bus, as I look out of the window, I finally decide not to go on with what I was trying to write. There’s nothing wrong with giving up if that makes you feel better. The thought of this fills me with relief. Before I know it, I jump off my seat and get out of the bus. It’s a random stop – Frederik Hendrikplantsoen. I might have given up on writing for the day, but I am not giving up on photos just yet.
Soon I realise that writing is not only about inspiration. It’s about courage, as well.
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I\’ve been there too. Sometimes the pressure to write something becomes so much that it completely blocks my ability to write anything. I\’ve slowly discovered that the things that works best then (for me at least) is to write anything, even if I think it is bad, leave it be for a bit and then come back to it later. That usually helps me find another way to approach it.